Recently I have been spending a lot of time pitying myself. Not because of one huge reason but a bunch of small ones. "Things aren't going my way." "Nothing goes easy for us." "I just one thing would go right." A list like this could probably go on and on. While some of my reasons for being upset are legitimate and would make anyone feel a little down the majority of them are just things that I am dwelling on. As a woman, I think it is often typical for most of us to hold onto things that makes us feel bad instead of just letting them go. I know for me, I have always done this and it is always a constant struggle. I want to hold onto things. I don't want to forget that things don't go perfect for me.
I have been convicted of these feelings lately. I been slowly reminded that while things don't always go smoothly and the way that I have planned God has a greater plan. Even in my darkest moments of questioning why some things are the way they are I have hope and trust in the Lord and that he knows best. His timing is always better than mine. His plans are always greater than mine. And as much as I want to control things and the way things turn out (because for those of you who don't know I what some call a 'control freak' - oh and as third graders would say a 'know it all') I have realized time and time again that if I I simply put my trust in the Lord he will see me through any circumstance.
Trusting is a whole different ball game but these thoughts led me to start thinking more about where my hope comes from. It also got to me thinking of where other people's hope comes from that do not know the Lord. I cannot imagine going through questions and hardships and not have hope in Christ that gets me through to the end of the tunnel. Looking back over my life through things that have happened that made me question the Lord's plan and the Lord's faithfulness (questioning isn't a bad thing fyi) I have never lost hope in Him.
My hope is in the Lord. I believe the Lord will bring to those who put their hope in trust in Him. Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not on my time schedule, and maybe not without some heartache in between, but the Lord is always faithful. I find not only hope in the Lord but comfort.
My heart aches for those who go through hard times and have nothing or no one to hope in. I don't know how I would have made it through even the smallest of events without even a small glimmer of the belief in the Lord.
I hope that no matter what I encounter tomorrow and in the future that my trust will remain fully rooted in the greatness of the Lord. And I am so glad to be reminded that at the end of every dark tunnel there is something great that the Lord has in store for my life.
I am glad that you are learning this at such a young age Michele. I have just really learned this well in the last 6 years. To know that God will supply every need, that He is already working on the answer to the prayer that you are about to pray, and that every circumstance in your life, good or bad, He is allowing to make you more like Him, is a comfort! I thank God that He chose me before the foundation of the world to be His child!
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