This Life.

I know I am not alone when I admit this. Sometimes I compare myself to others. Sometimes I envy what other people have and what they are doing with their life. Sometimes I try to do so many things all at once not only to gain a memory for myself but so that I don't miss out on being in someone's memory. Not all the time, but sometimes I sit back and question myself. Not life shattering questions but just really think about my life and ask what the heck I am doing and why I am doing it. And sometimes I realize I am doing things for the wrong reasons.
Yesterday the message at church reminded me that it is better to have less of something that doesn't matter and have more of what does. I spend so much time chasing after things that don't matter most in life that I miss out on loving the things that do.
As Coy and I have had a lot of ups and downs over the past few months and a lot of change and uncertainty coming our way it has at times been difficult to remember that my value doesn't come from things the world views as valuable. And yet, at other times it has come so easily to look at my sweet husband and our family and our friends and know in the deep of my soul that I am blessed beyond words. I see my husband and look back on our almost two years of marriage together and am amazed how each day I love him more than the day before. I know when I look at him and at our lives that I could be content being poor with him and living in a shack for the rest of our lives because we would be doing it together. Now, that doesn't mean I wouldn't want things I didn't have (of course that's a given) but in the end I would rather be living in the valley with him then on top of the mountains alone.
So I am challenging myself on days where I feel uncertain and when I question things in life to remember that God has a perfect plan. His ways are always greater than mine. I need to let go of the things that don't matter and cling to the things that do. God doesn't want us to have things in life that will have us. He wants us to live a free life, throwing off everything that hinders and fighting for things that do matter. Because as I was reminded yesterday if both of my hands are constantly full of things then I don't have a free hand to tend to the important things in life.

And because there is nothing more free than the ocean here are a few pictures to remind me of what it means to be free of certain things and full of the life God has in store for me.